Waiting for Gertrude: A Graveyard Gothic by Bill Richardson Download (read online) free eBook (PDF ePub Kindle)

Waiting for Gertrude: A Graveyard Gothic

In Paris’s Pere-Lachaise cemetery lie the bones of many renowned departed. It is also home to a large number of stray cats. Now, what if by some strange twist of fate, the souls of the famous were reborn in the cats with their personalities intact? There’s Maria Callas, a wilful and imperious diva, wailing late into the night. Earthy, bawdy chanteuse Edith Piaf is a foul-m


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    Bill

    Nov 09, 2008

    rated it
    it was amazing

    If you love cats, and you love France, and you have an extremely peculiar sense of humor and an appreciation for the absurd, I think you’ll love this book. You may even adore it.

    Waiting for Gertrude is set in Paris’ gargantuan Pere Lachaise cemetery, where the souls of some of the notables buried therein have returned to Earth (translated, to use their term) as cats. A befurred Alice B. Toklas (the book’s narrator) is waiting, and waiting, and waiting for her dear Gertrude Stein to reincarnate (

    Waiting for Gertrude is set in Paris’ gargantuan Pere Lachaise cemetery, where the souls of some of the notables buried therein have returned to Earth (translated, to use their term) as cats. A befurred Alice B. Toklas (the book’s narrator) is waiting, and waiting, and waiting for her dear Gertrude Stein to reincarnate (translate) while Oscar Wilde pines and whines and preens hoping to attract the affection of his beloved Jim Morrison (“Jamz”), a ferocious, kitten-devouring three-testicled tomcat. All the while, quadriped versions of Isadora Duncan and Edith Piaf are making all kinds of merry hell for the other feline residents of the cemetery who include:

    Jean de la Fontaine, the French fabulist returned now as a second-rate tour guide who insists on delivering his lectures in iambic pentameter, and whose poems introduce the various characters and situations;

    Modigliani – then as now, a great painter;

    Rossini – an aged and quite senile cat who cannot remember he was once a composer;

    Collette – a high-class Persian cat of aristocratic ownership who followed a randy tomcat from her wealthy home to the cemetery, and now a noted teacher of yoga;

    Chopin – the once-composer and now Per Lachaise’s Postmaster General, where the cats have learned how to write and do write often;

    Sarah Bernhardt – still an actress despite losing a leg;

    Marcel Proust – a Private Investigator investigating a series of mysterious thefts taking place over the course of the novel and whose head is often – quite literally – stuck up his nethermost orifice in search of inspiration;

    Heloise and Abelard – back on Earth as kitties who are, respectively, a highend caterer and “lifestyle consultant” and a publicist; and,

    Ondine – the only human character, known as the “Spay Queen;” the cats’ arch-nemesis and an enthusiastic proponent of feline population control

    Readers who appreciate a novel that is extremely weird but profoundly humorous and satirical will enjoy Waiting for Gertrude. Part romance, part fantasy, and part satire, the reader who enjoys Monty Python and Douglas Adams will be perfect for this insane look at the afterlife.

    You simply have to love a book containing a sentence that reads, “There never was such a ratter as Sarah Bernhardt!” What a fun read!
    …more

    dely

    Sep 15, 2013

    rated it
    really liked it

     · 
    review of another edition

    Shelves:
    cats,
    0-canada

    Che storia graziosa e divertente!
    La storia si svolge nel cimitero parigino Père-Lachaise dove vive una colonia di gatti randagi; ma non sono gatti comuni perché ogni micio è una reincarnazione di un personaggio illustre seppellito in quel cimitero e tutti si ricordano delle loro vite umane.
    La narratrice principale è Alice B. Toklas che aspetta ansiosamente l’incarnazione della sua amata Gertrude Stein. Nel frattempo si dedica a preparare stuzzichini e manicaretti a base di hashish e accudisce le

    Ci sono molti dettagli sulle vite di questi personaggi illustri ed è un libro veramente divertente e ben scritto. Alcune parti sono poetiche, altre sono malinconiche, ma il più delle volte questi gatti ci strappano un sorriso.
    …more

    Susan

    Jul 31, 2009

    rated it
    liked it

    Shelves:
    fantasy

    This fantasy will not be for everyone–it’s definitely not a children’s book. Richardson posits that many of the cats in Paris’s Pere Lachaise cemetery are, in fact, reincarnated versions of some of the famous people buried there. Some retain their two-legged characteristics–Isadora Duncan is now a dancing cat–and some take up new occupations–Marcel Proust is an introspective private investigator. But the main character is Alice B. Toklas, waiting for the long-delayed reincarnation of her bel

    …more

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